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| More Complicated Than A Nuclear Bomb |
There I was on the Blackest of Black Fridays, sitting in my basement with 857 pieces spread out on the floor, assembling our new elliptical machine. The directions were actually blueprints. My wife, Leigha woke up at to get our sizeable solitary purchase of note for the year. An elliptical machine was one of those things that we had thought about buying for quite some time. In fact, it was the machine of choice when we were losing weight for our wedding. In the four and a half years since we got married, I have never worked out regularly and gained roughly fifty pounds. When we saw the ad in the paper for fifty percent off a new machine, it seemed as if it was the proper time. Later that day, as I was assembling the device, Leigha took the kids with her to look for some more hot deals.
“I just like watching how crazy the people get.” She said.
Two hours and sixteen steps into the assembly, I thought that I should get a merit badge for all this work; which led to thinking about how cool it would be if people got life badges. Thus the genesis of this blog.
I have broken the blog into six different categories: Family, Man Things, Travel/Adventure, Things to Know, Health and Miscellaneous.
1. Family
My family is the most important thing to me in the world. Leigha and I are both conscientious about mentally stimulating our children in fun ways. Mainly, we want to provide the opportunity to do those activities that kids do in preschool or in sixties movies. Everybody has heard about making a baking soda volcano, but I don’t know anybody that has actually ever done one. In reality, this category is only me trying to be a good and involved father.
2. Man Things
I am in no way mechanically inclined, nor skilled in most things “manly.” I have my father to blame for this one. He raised my brother and me to be more emotional and less handy than our sisters. My dad, in turn, has his father to blame. Good ‘ol Clarence Williams died when my dad was four years old. My forty-year-old grandma didn’t bring many manly nuggets of enlightenment while she and my dad lived in a converted chicken shack. Neither did any of his siblings, the closest of whom was twelve years old at the time. Needless to say, I have vowed to break the cycle of manly ineptitude with Tate. I’ve already taught him how to growl and cheer at football, so my next responsibility is to learn small menial tasks in which I can one day pass on.
3. Adventure/Travel
When I was growing up, we didn’t go on vacations. Before leaving home, I can remember three. The first is going to St. Louis for the 4th of July. There are only three things that I remember about that trip: my little sister, Heather vomiting out of the back window of the car and consequently not going up the famous Arch. Finally, I remember watching fireworks with those cheap glasses that refract light, making it look as if you’ve been swimming all day.
The second trip, I was a freshman in high school. My mom, two sisters, my step-dad and I drove to Colorado in a compact car. The highlights from that trip were as follows: 1. Dave getting mad that I rolled down the window and was dancing my hand in the wind, so he rolled the window up on my hand. Seeing mountains for the first time. 2. Attempting to hike on said mountains, but my foot as still too weak a year after surgery. So I sat on top of a large boulder and watched chipmunks as my family continued without me. 3. Watching a herd of Elk splash in a water trap of a golf course as we drove by.
The third trip was to visit my brother, Arik in Texas. This trip was only my mom, Heather and me. The unique thing about this trip was that mom let me choose the driving routes. On the way down, we took a leisurely approach and made several stops along the way. The return route was more business; just getting home.
It was this last trip that really sparked my interest in travel. It didn’t take long for me to go on more vacations once I was on my own. I guess that’s why they created Spring Break. I still feel like there is a lot of traveling that I need to catch up on. I’ve never been to a lot of the iconic places in the American Childhood such as Disneyland, the Grand Canyon, etc.
4. Things to Know
When I was younger, my dad kept a copy of his last will and testament in the freezer. I’ve read it several times. One phrase that has stuck with me is that I have an “unquenchable thirst for knowledge”. I am the kind of guy that will look up the answers to those “I wonder why…” questions (Where did the term chop-chop come from? Why is it called a hat trick?) I like to know things for no other reason than knowing, with, apparently, the exception being “man stuff”. The problem with learning is that sometimes you forget. I don’t remember the capitals to all of the states. I never learned the order of all of the U.S. Presidents. I don’t remember which amendments are which. I remember when I was sitting in a class where we were talking about IQ tests and thinking to myself that college sophomores should have the highest IQs. It is at this point that you haven’t narrowing your field of study and have a fresh and broad knowledge of things. This is a grouping of thing that I hope that in random conversations, I can say “I can do that”.
5. Health
When I was in college, I weighed a hefty 280 pounds. Although I stand 6’ 3”, this is still big for somebody that is 7 feet tall. In retrospect, this isn’t a shock. I was a lazy, video game playing, movie watching, and beer drinking college kid. When Leigha and I first started dating, I was at the height of my gluttony. I ate out most meals, and drank almost as much as I ate. When we got married, I weighed 217 pounds. This was the lightest that I had ever been in my adult life. It came from hard work and discipline. When we were on our honeymoon, we started to live it up and ignore everything that we had been doing for the months leading up to our wedding. In essence, I slipped back into my lazy ways. When I lost my motivation, I tend to hover around 260 pounds. Roughly fifty pounds overweight. My kids are getting to the age where they will start being involved with organized sporting activities, and I want to be able to keep up.
6. Miscellaneous
These are all of those random things that I can’t fit into one of the other five categories.
My wish is that this blog will be interactive. I want people’s feedback and recommendations for things to do. What do you like? What don’t you like? I plan on having a month-long activity each month that I will give updates on (Not going grocery shopping, growing a beard, etc.). Then I will also post weekly entries on smaller items. Many of the things that I hope to do will jump between different categories, but the ultimate goal is to help become a well-rounded person. I hope that you enjoy, and I look forward to hearing from you.
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