Thursday, March 28, 2013

An Argument For Same-Sex Marriage

Those of you that know me or have gotten to know me from this blog, it is safe to say that I am extremely laid-back and don't get upset or offended by much. But this is a different type of thing that I've ever posted before. With the Supreme Court reviewing same-sex marriages in the US, it is an even hotter topic than normal. Let me give you a back-story to how this post originated, as much of it is in response to this article and these people's comments. It started when I posted this on Facebook:

Bride and groom embrace and looking at each other

When I first saw this, I thought to myself "they aren't gay". Then I realized that they were talking about bi-racial marriages. I am glad that it never seemed weird to me that this couple could be married. I have several bi-racial cousins and when I was a kid, my best friend's dad was gay. I never thought of these as my "black cousins" or my friend's "gay dad". They were just friends and family. My dad is old enough to remember segregated bathrooms/drinking fountains, etc but the thought of such a thing is absurd to me. A lot can change in one generation. I hope that when my kids are my age, they think of same-sex marriages the same way that I saw this bi-racial couple. Just two people in love.
This was the response I got:
o    Person 1 Hey Adam! Don't know if you've heard any of the points from the other side of this debate but thought I'd share a really well written article I found the other day. I always like to hear both sides of the story, so I figured I'd share  http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2012/07/19/gay-is-not-the-new-black/
o    Person 2 Ahhh religion!!! If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her” is found in John 8:1-11. Dear Nathan...perhaps you too should dig deeper into your Christian believe!!! Who are you to judge when Jesus himself choose not to cast the stone on the prostitute woman, because there was a "LAW" in the book!!! BTW, I am a Catholic but not one who follows the bible teaching blindly because it is written in there.
o    Person 1 [Person 2]...I didn't judge anybody. The Bible was written by God, and His people are tasked with defending it and sharing the good news. Read Romans 1:18-32 http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans%201:18-32&version=ESV God is a perfect and just Judge...It's His words, not mine.
o    Person 1 Yes, you are judging when you have made the decision not to accept gay marriages. :(Let God be the judge and choose to love all our neighbors!
o    Person 2 [Person 1], I'm not trying to have a debate on Adam's link here. I just wanted to share an article with him I found to be very fact-filled and interesting to both sides of the debate. I wont comment any further after this one unless Adam wants to discuss something and he chimes in, but I must tell you that you are wrong - I am not judging anybody.
I am using the DISCERNING mind that God has given me to see Sin for what it is: Sin. Discernment is not Judging. For example, when a police officer pulls somebody over for speeding they are not actually "judging" anybody...they discerned that somebody was violating a clearly written standard or rule (just like what is written in Romans 1) and set up a meeting between the Judge & the person in question. This is the task of anybody who truly knows Jesus Christ & believes that the consequence of Sin is death and eternal separation from God in hell. If you read that passage I linked there is no other determination that can be come to - If you claim to know Jesus than you really need to start loving people by pointing out that their running head long into an eternity of paying for their own sins and that Jesus paid for them all already! It is the BEST news! All that is needed is to accept that they are a sinner, admit Jesus is Lord and look to Him alone for their redemption from Sin. Nothing else is needed but Jesus. He paid it all! Only that relationship and those terms will stand before God - all else will end up in Hell. A supplemented Christ is a Supplanted Christ.
First off, in reaction to the article the Person 1 posted, I have to say that I respect him trying to provide an open forum for discussing this matter. I find the article, on the other hand, a hard pill to swallow if it is supposed to represent both sides of the argument of same-sex marriage. Before I start my dissection of the article, let me make something clear. Most people, regardless of their stance on homosexuality, have come to agree that it is not a choice. I am operating under the guise that we are all in agreement of that.
First, I would like to address the most fallible topic in the entire article equating pedophilia and homosexuality. Generally, when pedophilia is concerned, sexuality is not. I don’t know of any group that would like to be associated with an abhorrent practice. The Jerry Sandusky trial wasn’t about him having sex with other males. It was about him raping children.
Second, I don’t understand the importance in identification. The only merit of this seems to be one of limitation. This has been done several times throughout history. The Scarlet letter of an adulterer, women with moles/birthmarks for witch hunters and the Star of David for Jews during the holocaust. None of these are proud moments in history for anybody. To stick with your police analogy, the Gestapo was a special police that were sent out by Hitler to enforce a clearly written law. This is an intentionally extreme example. The bible (in this country) isn’t law.  I think that it is foolish to think that the Bible isn’t influenced by man. I think that it is a great guide to live life. It teaches people to be good and be good unto others. But if you take everything as literal, that would believe that somebody really lived inside a whale and that people lived to be 700 years old. The Bible is filled with allegorical tales with historical basis. One passage that is used to support the argument against homosexuality is Genesis 9:20-27. This tells of Noah’s son, Ham sodomizing him. Much like the pedophile argument, I read this story not as anti-homosexuality, but as anti-drunken rape. Today, if Ham raped his father, he might go to jail. Once released, he would lose his right to vote, to be part of a jury or to possess a firearm. But unlike the homosexual, he would still be able to get married and receive all of the financial benefits that are allowed a married person.
As far as showing the marriage is already discriminating against people that are too young or closely related this is another laughable argument. Everybody can agree that a child’s capability to make sensible, well-thought out non-emotional decisions varies but aren’t made until they are older. These capabilities are influenced by the biological necessity of hormones and growth. This is why children aren’t allowed to drive, drink alcohol or other things that could be dangerous to them. As for incest, I am not even going to warrant the argument with the medical evidence showing why it shouldn’t be allowed.
As for the historical aspect of homosexuality, a same-sex marriage between the two men Pedro Díaz and Muño Vandilaz in the Galician municipality of Rairiz de Veiga in Spain occurred on 16 April 1061. They were married by a priest at a small chapel. The historic documents about the church wedding were found at Monastery of San Salvador de Celanova. Homosexuality was also openly practiced in ancient Greece. This is neither a new nor a local topic. This is an ancient and global topic. There are 11 countries in the world where same-sex marriages are legal: Argentina, Belgium, Canada, Denmark, Iceland, Netherlands, Norway, Portugal, Spain, South Africa and Sweden. Studies conducted in several countries indicate that support for the legal recognition of same-sex marriage increases with higher levels of education. Based on the standard of living, seven of these countries consist of these countries are fall under the highest possible category, “very high human development”. Norway (1), Netherlands (4), Sweden (7), Canda (11), Iceland (13), Denmark (15), Belgium (17), Spain (23). There are only 24 countries that make this list. The United States (3) and  Israel (16) have areas that perform or recognize same-sex marriages.

One thing is certain: love can be unconditional, but hate has to be learned. As I stated above, I hope that one day, our children will truly see love as a blind and certain thing that affects everybody.

Please comment this below, but please keep this a respectful argument.


  1. Thanks for posting this, Adam! It's interesting to read your point of view on my short exchange with primarily one person earlier on a social media site. I understand the points you've made but, to give you honest feedback, I find your "dissection" of the article I linked to be quite lacking...It's simply not a defeating argument of any of my article's points. It's simply a statement of your belief with a few historical trivia details sprinkled in for good measure. Take it for what it is - One person's analysis...and maybe the only person, other than yourself, who has read both articles.

    The most discouraging part of your article was this section: "The bible (in this country) isn’t law. I think that it is foolish to think that the Bible isn’t influenced by man. I think that it is a great guide to live life. It teaches people to be good and be good unto others. But if you take everything as literal, that would believe that somebody really lived inside a whale and that people lived to be 700 years old. The Bible is filled with allegorical tales with historical basis." The reason it was discouraging is because I believe it to be the Word of God. I believe it to Infallible. This is because it has yet to be proven fallible...and trust me many have tried - diligently. It says many times, from different authors over 1000's of years, that it is the Word of God and that these weren't their words. It contains 100's of fulfilled prophecies and 100's yet to come. It describes itself as being God-Breathed in 2 Timothy 3. Of course human men moved the writing instruments - that's the only way a Spirit (which of course God the Father is a Spirit) can write a physical book.

    To believe these things takes faith - it's a no-brainer that Christianity requires faith to be a follower. This is by design - God doesn't want robotic followers who believe out of necessity or out of fact. That doesn't provide the kind of follower God is interested in...He wants people who have put their trust in His Word and the innumerable pieces of evidence He's provided to lead us to Him. I don't know why that is the type of Worshipers God wants - but He does...I don't claim to understand God's every thought.

    What I do understand is that Jesus was either a lunatic, a liar, or Lord. To do the things he did & say the things he said he would have to be either crazy (which no one truly claims at any point in the Biblical record), not being truthful (which would make Jesus the most horrible and vile kind of person ever - which I think most would agree - is not a fair assessment of the man), or He is the Lord of Lords, God with Man, Emmanuel. If I'm right then it's an eternal situation we're all in together and one that would require a deep hatred on my part to not share, and share diligently. Hopefully you can understand my perspective on this and I look forward to hearing from you if you have any questions for me after reading this.

  2. Personally--- and I would like to point out that this is my personal opinion, being me and in no way a response to any comment listed here--- I believe that there is just one large thing that ties each human to each other, and that is that we all are born, live a certain amount of time on this planet and then pass from this world.

    I think the most important thing to remember as a human being is that you are only on this earth that short length of time, and so is every other human being around you. Your end-of-life goal- be it heaven, reincarnation, what-have-you, is your goal (and yours alone), as you will exit to that goal in the same way as every other person (again, alone). I believe that it is your responsibility, and no one else's, to get you to that end of life goal. Thus, your decisions in life should also be made as such- they're your decisions, it's your life.

    I do agree that there are certain points where society must draw the line, as with murders, rape, incest, etc. Those laws are there to protect those who cannot protect themselves and to keep everyone on their own path without having it unjustly taken away from them. With marriage, however, it is a decision that those two people make, about how they want to live their life. The fact that they want to live together and support each other and put up with each other doesn't interfere with how anyone else will reach their "end-of-life goal". If being gay is truly bad and wrong and there is some exclusive heaven that won't allow them in, this heaven certainly won't keep you out just because they existed.

    I guess all I'm really saying is, everyone has their own kind of happy, and who is anyone to say that kind of happy isn't right?

    So there's my personal opinion- and just for one more.... er, comment.... here's an awesome quote:

    "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love" - Dr. Suess.

  3. I definitely agree with you, I think if there really is a separation of church and state then there really is no debate.

  4. I wonder how many people interviewed about this topic are neither for nor against? I myself fit into that category. However, I am not religious so I don't have that bias swaying me. The argument of civil-rights I don't agree with as I don't know how you can classify homosexuals as a minority, but that seems to be the loudest voice for a group trying to get heard. I guess my strongest thought is, reverse the roles. Imagine the bible says no opposite-sex marriages. The world is made up of mostly same-sex households and there is a group of opposite-sex partners trying to get the same legal rights to marriage as everyone else. Would it be the same fight or would everybody say, oh yeah, they are 2 responsible adults, of course they should have the same rights? Again, I am neither for nor against gay marriage, I just don't see the argument against it other than religion.


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