30 Days Of Thanks: Vincent (Foreign Exchange Student)

Dear Vincent,

            You were my first legally sponsored alien. I was in 8^th grade when you ducked through the doorway of my life. I remember thinking that “they make ‘em big in Germany” when I first say you. Over the next school year, you became a brother.           

I remember that you had an insane love for Mountain Dew. Do you remember when we figured that you had drunk enough Mountain Dew to fill the tank of a car? Nuts. My teeth hurt thinking about it.

To this day, I'm shocked that you sucked at basketball. I remember that we would spend hours playing 'Horse' or '21', but you couldn't dominate despite the fact that I hadn't hit my growth spurt yet.

            Whenever we had foreign exchange students, my gauge of proficiency in English was how well people could understand T.V. shows. We spent a lot of time watching Beavis and Butthead or standup comedy. (Caroline's Comedy Club)

            You always had an explosive laugh. It wasn't a chuckle or giggle. It was a full-bodied yell often accompanied with the clap of a hand and the stomping of a foot. I always liked to make you laugh. I've always had an appreciation for people with a quick-witted mind. I remember sitting in the living room or on the front steps joking back and forth. I guess that's why I've always thought that I could be a comedian. Because, frankly, I was always funnier than you. It just blows my mind that you went and became a lawyer as a backup plan. Got it a little backwards, don't you think? That's just showing off.

            I would love to see you perform sometime, but there are a few snags to that plan. First, I don't speak gibberish. Or German. Secondly, it seems that, although you've returned to the U.S. twice to visit, you seem to have this notion that it would only be fair for me to visit you next. That would make for an interesting blog entry. Leigha did take German in high school.

            I have to tell you that I shop at Aldi frequently these days. Every once in a while, I see one of their bags and think of you. Or more appropriately, I think of AldiMan. I wonder whatever happened to that video. The two of us holding a rally in the bedroom, making up a pledge of allegiance as we went, ending with a "Heil Aldi". Then the beating out in the front lawn. I wonder what the neighbors thought. I also wonder if I would actually want to see the video if I ever found it. Would it just be intentionally offensive and not as funny as I remember it in my head?

           I'm glad that you came to America to join my family. Thanks for that. Sometime everybody needs a funny German that is bigger than you to teach you a lesson in humility.

Love,

Adam